Japanese keigo basics: teineigo, sonkeigo and kenjōgo explained with examples

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Keigo (敬語), Japanese polite language, has a fearsome reputation, even among Japanese people. The good news is that you do not need to master all of it to be polite. Learn how the three types work, a dozen special verbs and a few set phrases, and you will handle most everyday situations.

The three types

Teineigo (丁寧語), polite language: the desu/masu forms. Neutral politeness used with strangers, colleagues and anyone you are not close to.
Sonkeigo (尊敬語), respectful language: used to raise the other person by describing their actions respectfully.
Kenjōgo (謙譲語), humble language: used to lower yourself (or your group) by describing your own actions humbly.

The key idea: sonkeigo is for their actions, kenjōgo is for your actions. Getting this backwards, such as using a respectful verb about yourself, is the most common learner mistake.

Teineigo: start here

Teineigo is what most textbooks teach first, and it is enough for most conversations as a foreigner.

Nouns and adjectives take です (desu): 学生です (gakusei desu), I am a student.
Verbs take ます (masu): 食べます (tabemasu), I eat; 行きます (ikimasu), I go.
Negatives: 食べません (tabemasen), 学生ではありません (gakusei dewa arimasen).
Polite prefixes お and ご also belong here: お水 (omizu, water), ご飯 (gohan, rice or a meal).

If in doubt, use desu/masu. Nobody will think you rude for it.

Special verbs

Some common verbs have their own respectful and humble forms. These are the ones you will hear constantly.

To be / go / come: いらっしゃる (irassharu, respectful); 参る (mairu, humble, go/come) and おる (oru, humble, be).
To do: なさる (nasaru, respectful); いたす (itasu, humble).
To say: おっしゃる (ossharu, respectful); 申す (mōsu) or 申し上げる (mōshiageru, humble).
To eat / drink: 召し上がる (meshiagaru, respectful); いただく (itadaku, humble).
To see: ご覧になる (goran ni naru, respectful); 拝見する (haiken suru, humble).
To know: ご存じだ (gozonji da, respectful); 存じる (zonjiru, humble).
To visit: 伺う (ukagau, humble).
To give: くださる (kudasaru, someone gives to me, respectful); 差し上げる (sashiageru, I give, humble).

For example, 社長はいらっしゃいますか (Shachō wa irasshaimasu ka?), "Is the company president in?"; and 田中と申します (Tanaka to mōshimasu), "My name is Tanaka."

Regular patterns

For verbs without a special form:

Respectful: お + verb stem + になる. 待つ (matsu, wait) becomes お待ちになる (omachi ni naru).
Humble: お + verb stem + する. 持つ (motsu, carry) becomes お持ちします (omochi shimasu), "I will carry it for you."
The passive form can also be respectful: 書かれる (kakareru), (someone respected) writes.

When to use which

Shops, hotels and restaurants: staff use full keigo with you. You do not need to answer in keigo; desu/masu is perfect.
Work: sonkeigo for clients and superiors, kenjōgo for your own actions, and teineigo with colleagues. When talking to someone outside your company, your own boss counts as part of "your" group, so you use humble forms about them, even though you would use respectful forms to their face.
Friends and family: plain form, no keigo. Using keigo with close friends sounds distant.

Set phrases worth memorising

いらっしゃいませ (irasshaimase): welcome, said by shop staff. You do not reply to it.
かしこまりました (kashikomarimashita): certainly, understood. Polite version of わかりました.
少々お待ちください (shōshō omachi kudasai): please wait a moment.
お世話になっております (osewa ni natte orimasu): the standard opening for business emails and calls, roughly "thank you for your continued support".
よろしくお願いいたします (yoroshiku onegai itashimasu): a humble "I look forward to working with you", used to close emails and introductions.
失礼いたします (shitsurei itashimasu): excuse me, said entering or leaving a room or ending a call.
恐れ入りますが (osoreirimasu ga): I'm sorry to trouble you, but…

How to practise

Listen to shop announcements, station staff and business dramas: they are full of keigo. Practise self-introductions and a few work phrases aloud until they come out without thinking. Which keigo form trips you up most? Ask your questions or share your own mistakes in the comments.